So its only been three months, not a largely embarrassing about of time, and I’m writing again! What’s more, I’m actually getting through some of my TBR as well!

The problem of getting through the list though, is that sometimes you grab a novel that you intend to read over a busy week. . .and finish it in a day. For me, that was Joe Abercrombie’s Half a King. I haven’t read a book in a day for a long time, but this didn’t even feel like it was taking any time at all. Not quite as dark as what I usually read, or as previous Abercrombie books I’ve read; but it was immersive, engaging, and flowed extremely well. I’m still working through the backlist, but easily my favourite of his so far.

I’ve also gone back to re-reading some books I finished over the last few years, but with those years being somewhat hectic, I struggled to retain much from them. They are the books I know I enjoyed, but I was too exhausted to appreciate properly at the time. One such book is K.M. Allan’s Blackbirch: The Beginning, and I’m so glad I went back to it. There are certain books you read where you can feel the passion for the story flowing through the characters, the world, and the history – this is one such book. Josh, Eve, Max, and Sarah feel as real as they can be, and I can’t wait to get back into the next three in the series.

But I digress – onto live reacts being terrifying.

Over the last few months, I’ve been fortunate enough to be involved with the Australian National Veterans Art Museum’s (ANVAM) Festival of Veterans Arts (FOVA), through my membership of the ADF Creative Arts Association. As part of FOVA, ADF Creative had an exhibition (or technically has, it’s there until Friday. . .and by ‘there’ I mean 175 Sturt Street, Southbank in Melbourne), and has also been involved with a number of creative workshops including painting, printing, sculpture, dance, writing, and comedy. Its been great so far.

Except for one absolutely terrifying incident (that was objectively a good thing, but still terrifying).

As a writer, I always struggle with how to exhibit work, and have tried a few different things. I’ve had stories written across painted scenes, made one into a small decorative booklet, and had a video of one simply with words scrolling across a turning page.

That last one was meant to be a ‘filler’ piece from last year’s exhibit. Except at the opening, when it came up in the video reel, for some reason, everyone (and that isn’t hyperbole – literally everyone in the room) stopped to read. Its a slow way to read a story, and there’s nothing exciting happening in the animation. And yet, they stayed. Not a huge crowd, only about 15-20 people, but it was, from my perspective, a little surreal. Literally watching people read and react to the story live in real time.

Which, for all their positive words afterwards, was terrifying. It wasn’t something I expected or was prepared for, particularly as it was meant to be filler to break up some of the other videos.

It was (and still is) terrifying in a way that throwing personal pieces of work out there can be, mostly because I think I was entirely unprepared for anyone to notice it at all (its a few minutes of a two hour loop). But it was nice to see people take an interest, and I’m appreciative that they cared enough to stick around and read the whole thing. It wasn’t a bad experience, just one that amplified the anxiety sometimes associated with putting work out there. Which is a very real anxiety for me, but also a necessary part of sharing art is. . .well, the sharing bit.

I had to leave Melbourne before the exhibit closed due to family commitments, but over the next couple of days, I hope a few more people get a chance to read and enjoy it. Or maybe they’ll act how I expect people to, and move on before the story finishes. But either way, I’m glad for the experience of being a (very sweaty, very anxious) fly on wall watching people read it. I’m also glad that a) they seemed to enjoy it, and b), I don’t have to go through watching people read it again.

~Nathan